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[alienates]

KARKAT VANTAS

I probably do not give a fuck.

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

Comments

[alienates]

What if I was in desperate need of shin surgery? You could be fucking me up right now and you wouldn't even care.

[ he does not need shin surgery. ]

[notbunaga]

You would've complained about it already, so I think we're fine.

[alienates]

Maybe I don't like telling others about my pain.

[notbunaga]

Then start including me in that, will you?

[alienates]

It's hard when you are a direct fucking cause of it.

[notbunaga]

Well maybe if you weren't so unlikable I'd have no reason to bother you.

[alienates]

Hey. How does it feel to be so wrong all the time?

1/2

[notbunaga]

...

Let me find out for you.

[Goes onto her phone...]

[notbunaga]

[unsurprisingly he gets a text

it says...]

How does it feel to be so wrong all the time? Asking for what is quite literally the opposite of a friend.

[alienates]

[ he pulls out his phone when he gets the message. he puts the phone back in his pocket. ]

I give that a 3/10.

[notbunaga]

Oh come on, that was a good one, you have to admit.

Put aside your dislike of me for a second and give me the 10 I deserve. Or at least an 8.

[alienates]

I'm willing to go up to a 6.

[notbunaga]

Fine. 7.

[how is this a negotiation now]

[alienates]

Hm, 6 and a half.

[ i don't know but i'm they're inside because this would look so stupid if they were still out in the hallway. ]

[notbunaga]

7.

[alienates]

I am not giving you the 7.

[notbunaga]

Okay, 8.

[what do you mean she's actually an adult]

[alienates]

Why? Is that your current age?

[ technically he is now an actual adult too. this is terrible. ]

[notbunaga]

I thought it was as high as you could count.

Sorry, still too high?

[alienates]

Oh man, you can help your new classmates in kindergarten come fall learn how to count.

[notbunaga]

If it reaches fall and there's talk of me going back to school, I want you to throw me into the ocean.

I can only trust you with this. Everyone else would hesitate.

[fuck that she already endured hell]

[alienates]

[ he stops to consider it... one one hand, it's what she wants, but on the other, he gets to slam dunk her into the ocean.

hmmm. ]

Deal.

[notbunaga]

I knew I could count on you, karkat.

[the nicest she's ever been to him]

[alienates]

It's the most I could do for you.

[ as in, that is literally all he is willing to do for her as a favor. ]

[notbunaga]

You're lucky, too. Yuuko won't hunt you down to kill you, either. You'll get away with drowning me totally free.