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[alienates]

i will make this pretty later

open for telepathy | voice | text | action | etc

Comments

[witchhooded]

[ a beat. ]

I'm not sure about the carrier. If there was one involved, it was after... I fell out of one or broke one open. Carriers have a top and a bottom that snap together which is what it looked like, but it didn't have a metal opening.

[alienates]

[ he's quiet for a moment. or, for how long as karkat is able to keep quiet. ]

I am really pissed off over the fact that you are out there, stuck in a horrible situation and all I can really do is sit around and wait for everyone here to figure out a way to get you back, since I am incapable of helping you on my own as if I was a newly hatched grub.

[ she did ask how he was doing. ]

[witchhooded]

[ oh, karkat. ]

Just talking is helping! I really miss you. I guess it's silly to say but hearing your voice is nice. It's... kind of a luxury, sort of.

[ she has a constant connection to the outside. if she wanted to, she could literally never end this telepathic phone call - but she will, because inevitably, someone will walk down that hall, put her in those cuffs and take her out for more experimentation. and she'd prefer to be dead before letting karkat hear that.

so yes. hearing him talk is a luxury. ]

[alienates]

[ talking is one thing that he is very good at, at least. ]

That is quite possibly the first and only time anyone has ever said that. I am utterly goddamn devastated that I didn't get to record it.

[ he misses her too. ]

What do you want to talk about?

[witchhooded]

You snooze, you lose, Karkat!

Um, anything? All of my conversations have been around this so not the whole kidnapping thing for a little bit. So... What did you do today?

[alienates]

[ if this was happening in person, he'd stick his tongue out at her for the first comment. ]

I discovered how to properly prepare a dish involving what you may call "peanut butter."

[witchhooded]

[ ..........peanut butter sounds really good, and jade's stomach growls a little bit. holy shit. ]

You are a regular chef now then!!! Maybe soon you will be on my level, a master spaghetti-ist, hehehe.

[alienates]

I accept the challenge. Soon, you will be begging me to provide you a nutritious meal. You will bang your eating utensils on the table, urging me to hurry up, but I'll tell you that perfection takes time as I stir the peanut butter in the pot.

[ for some reason in this fantasy he's boiling peanut butter. ]

[witchhooded]

[ it's a fine and dandy fantasy??? ]

Oh I am soooo convinced! What are you even cooking with peanut butter?

[alienates]

[ there's a silence.

he didn't think this far ahead. ]

Spaghetti.

[witchhooded]

[ UNACCEPTABLE?? ]

No, that is my specialty! You have to beat me at making.

[alienates]

You sound like you are just worried that I will dethrone you with my peanut butter spaghetti dish.

[ that he just made up right now. ]

[witchhooded]

Yep. I am so worried. The most worried. You are going to beat me at my own game and then I am going to be so embarrassed.

[ the joke is neither of them can cook. ]

So you use the peanut butter to boil your noodles?

[alienates]

It gives it a nice texture that makes it go down the nutrition tunnel a lot more smoothly.

[ ???????? ]

And it also provides that extra kick.

[witchhooded]

[ oh my god ]

That is not even remotely how peanut butter would boil!!! You are lying!! What do you really make with peanut butter, you silly goose?

[alienates]

I usually just stick my hand in the jar and then lick it from my hands.

[witchhooded]

[ i mean

adorable ]

That is so not cooking, Karkat!

But probably delicious.

[alienates]

It is absolutely goddamn amazing, Jade. And it is definitely cooking if I stick it in the microwave for five seconds first.

[ just wait til he figures out you can put it on a sandwich. ]

[witchhooded]

[ speaking of ]

If that's the case... You should try spreading it on bread! Especially the cinnamon raisin kind.

[alienates]

Peanut butter... on bread? Holy fuck. Harley, you're a genius!

[ because she is, obviously, the one who invented the peanut butter sandwich. [

[witchhooded]

[ there's something so hilarious about the idea of her creating peanut butter on bread that jade just snorts. maybe it's the concept of being able to eat peanut butter on bread? it's so comical to her. her meals have consisted of gruel and kibble and whatever else isn't going to be eaten by the people working here, but is still not past it's shelf expiration date. the snort turns into a giggle, turns into a laugh, turns into a cackle.

it's so funny.

this is so funny?

this is so. fucking funny.

this is it. this is the moment jade cracked. ]

Hehehehahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Hahahaha!! Oh jeez, oh jez, that is - the funniest thing someone has said in a long time... Genius...

[ it's a verbal/telepathic keysmash. ]

Peanut butter is a spread... it's good on crackers, too...Hehehe...

[alienates]

[ this, to the surprise of no one, completely bewilders him. there has to be some missing context here, because he cannot figure out why that was so funny without it.

and even with context he isn't sure why it would be considered this hilarious. you can probably feel the question marks emitting from him. ]

I am clearly missing something here about peanut butter that is very important to know.

[witchhooded]

It's funny! Because... it's just funny, Karkat!

[ a beat. ]

Oh jeez, this is like in that memo, isn't it. Argh.

[alienates]

If we weren't missing our trademarked text colors I would almost think this was a dream bubble.

[ he waits for her to continue though. ]

text

[witchhooded]

we can fix that :P
sorry about my dumb present self....
i... guess this whole thing has kind of warped my sense of normalcy!
or something
future me is probably more well adjusted so its nothing to worry about