Well, you know what they say about alcohol, right? Every glass has different notes when you get to different points, so a good taste-testing would definitely have to be a whole drink.
[It's amazing how easily and smoothly he just pulls bullshit out of thin air... Clearly his time in both the customer service industry and school has done him well.]
[ the problem here is that kashuu has gotten him? karkat knows this sounds like bullshit, but as someone who knows fuck all about alcohol and what people say about it, he can't confidently refute this since, for all he knows, this might be a real thing. goddammit. ]
This sounds very wrong but I don't care enough to argue with you about it, but just know that I am onto you and your lies.
[ he points at his eyes and then he points at kashuu's. dramatically. ]
It's why I was forced to take the convenience store job too. Sometimes you have to work three extremely different and fucking absurd jobs to make a living.
[ wait. ]
How much money do you think exorcists actually make?
[Is he actually giving this some serious thought? He might actually be giving this some serious thought.]
Well, it's not like there's a flood of exorcists out there, right? You'd totally have a monopoly on the market! In that kinda situation, you could charge however much you wanted and really boost your reputation up until people just think that's what your services are really worth.
Ooh, true, true. You'd have to find a way to fend 'em off! Or brand yourself so uniquely that no one would be able to copy you. ...Or maybe even want to copy you.
[He, too, is apparently down for talking like this is a Real Problem that Karkat is Really Having (or might really have someday), so here they are.]
Good one! Everyone wants to ride on the tailcoats of success as long as they're easy, but if they gotta work? I'm sure you'd lose like, three quarters of the competition right there.
[The competition in this grueling supernatural market... This is going to come back to haunt him when he realizes he was in fact the spirit all along.]
[ it's fine, karkat used to make alien jokes all the time and now he's like OOPS ]</small?
Fucking exactly. And for everyone else, you just have to be better than them, right?
[That isn't how PR teams work but honestly, this isn't how exorcism works as an industry either. ...Or wouldn't, rather, if it were a real thing. GO FOR BROKE.]
[A good question, honestly. Both of them are clearly masters of the Meandering Conversation™, which Kashuu happily indulges in as he starts cleaning up the bar area out of idleness.]
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Also Karkat is 100% correct.]
Twenty! But when you work with drinks it's important to know what flavors go best together, so a little taste-testing is fine.
[That is entirely bullshit and his punkass expression says he knows it.]
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[ karkat does not actually care enough to judge him or anything. if anything, he's amused? ]
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[It's amazing how easily and smoothly he just pulls bullshit out of thin air... Clearly his time in both the customer service industry and school has done him well.]
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This sounds very wrong but I don't care enough to argue with you about it, but just know that I am onto you and your lies.
[ he points at his eyes and then he points at kashuu's. dramatically. ]
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Eh? So you're an anti-ghost hunter and a detective?
[His tone is light and teasing, though, even as he brings up their trainwreck shitpost. Incredible.]
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I'm a man of many talents. Do you think I can make a living just by thwarting exorcists in this economy? Fuck no.
[ he'd probably be a terrible detective. ]
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Hm... I guess even the ghost economy's got its ups and downs then, huh? That's too bad, scraping by on commissions must be hard.
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[ wait. ]
How much money do you think exorcists actually make?
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Well, it's not like there's a flood of exorcists out there, right? You'd totally have a monopoly on the market! In that kinda situation, you could charge however much you wanted and really boost your reputation up until people just think that's what your services are really worth.
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[ this a completely fake hypothetical situation and yet karkat sounds like this is an actual, viable career choice for them. ]
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[He, too, is apparently down for talking like this is a Real Problem that Karkat is Really Having (or might really have someday), so here they are.]
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[ he isn't sure how to do that. he can probably bullshit it fairly well though. ]
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[The competition in this grueling supernatural market... This is going to come back to haunt him when he realizes he was in fact the spirit all along.]
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Bingo! And half of being better than them is up to your PR team and not your actual skill, anyway.
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[ karkat you don't really need a pr team.
he wonders if he can google this. ]
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[That isn't how PR teams work but honestly, this isn't how exorcism works as an industry either. ...Or wouldn't, rather, if it were a real thing. GO FOR BROKE.]
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Fine. You have the job. Congratulations.
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[Ah, what a reliable PR team he'll be...]
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[ IT'S FINE
what were they even originally talking about ]
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[A good question, honestly. Both of them are clearly masters of the Meandering Conversation™, which Kashuu happily indulges in as he starts cleaning up the bar area out of idleness.]
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[ look, he has only very recently started reaching out to people for help and sometimes it shows. ]
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Good thing I'm such a reliable one-man PR team, then.
[This is debatable, but at least Karkat will never run out of delicious beverages.]
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[ might as well take this ridiculousness all the way. ]
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[When will he decide if he's a ghostbusting barista or an actual demon barista, the real questions.]
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