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[alienates]

KARKAT VANTAS

I probably do not give a fuck.

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

Comments

[ghostories]

well that's over 9000 levels of rude!
have i ever given you any reason to doubt me?

[alienates]

All the times you've told me that school is where your inner child goes to die because they suck the life out of you through pointless busywork that stunts your brain more than help it?

[ghostories]

[ oh

sweats ]

that's the me of the past!
i'm turning over a new leaf
anya's been helping me with my studies
so i've been catching up...
and it's not like i'm dumb
i think i can really do it!

[alienates]

Ok
So... why are you turning over a new leaf?
Something had to have inspired you.

[ghostories]

oh!!
it's a long story
and you have to promise not to tell anyone

[alienates]

Promise.
You cannot see me but I just totally crossed my heart in a very sincere motion.

[ghostories]

i can't read your tone through text but i guess i'll have to trust you

[ DEEP BREATHS, which is why there's a long delay before she finally types ]

i think i have a boyfriend

[alienates]

[ there is also a delay, although not as long as yuuko's was. ]

WHO!!!!

[ he should probably say congrats first but this is very important info? he assumes it's mikorin, but he's gotta like. make sure. ]

[ghostories]

lol
i'll give you 3 guesses!!!

[ did he think this was going to be easy?? she could tell him but that's not as fun tbh. ]

[alienates]

[ it would be fun for karkat!!!!

for once in his life, karkat regrets primarily hanging out with yuuko with just the two of them because it means he does not get to witness her with her other friends that often. he prefers doing things as a pair but also, it makes guessing who she's dating hard? ]

Fuck
It's not that Yato guy is it???

[ghostories]

[ She would invite other friends to hang with them, but she doesn't like hanging out in groups either... ]

ewww no!
yato's like...
a cool older brother you used to admire when you were younger but he screwed up later in his life, so now you're not so sure. but you love him anyway because he's super nice to you and reliable when the time calls for it

[alienates]

That is one of the most insulting compliments I have ever seen, and that is saying something since I'm normally the one saying them.
Uhhhh
Mikoguy?

[ghostories]

[ squints at her phone because why can't karkat even remember his damn NAME he only had ONE JOB

but she must digress ]

hehe
no ♥

[alienates]

Oh my god
Yuuko
WHO

[ghostories]

do you want a hint?
ps a hint costs 1 pizza

[alienates]

A slice of pizza or an entire pizza?
Ugh whatever TELL ME THE HINT

[ghostories]

so demanding!
alright

[ She sends him a selfie of her wearing someone's trademark yellow scarf. ]

he lent me his scarf... ♥
anyway
even if i gave you a name, i bet you wouldn't know who he was!
he doesn't go to our school

[alienates]

[ karkat is not making the connection because he has (presumably?? it was handwaved) met ryoji in person like once so that is not enough times to immediately connect the scarf to him.

this is the worst hint. he cannot believe he wasted a pizza on something that told him nothing. ]

I know plenty of people who don't go to our school.
Try me!

[ghostories]

it'll cost you more pizzas

[alienates]

I guess we are throwing a one person pizza party!!!
I'll even include the party hats.
WHO????

[ghostories]

[ wait, she's calculating the pizzas in her head.

okay, this is fine. ]

ryoji mochizuki

[alienates]

HOLY SHIT
The love guy?!?!

[ghostories]

the love guy?
did something happen between you two? lol
he does say that sort of thing a lot!

[alienates]

Yeah we had a thing.
Not a thing thing in that kind of thing way
A thing where he kept telling me about how great love is and then tried to teach me how to say I love you and invited me out for pastries.

[ghostories]

lol
well isn't that how our conversations go?
idk why you're so surprised
he's just being nice!

[ let's forget how she threatened ryoji with murder if he ever got within a foot radius of anya ]